Thursday, May 17, 2012
Here I am...
There is so much excitement within me, webster cannot even provide me with words necessary to express myself. I am finally a college graduate and here I am pondering on the great achievements I have obtained. I will admit, I needed to remind myself to cease the moment. I am already too busy, planning my next step without savoring this one. That is a big no-no. I thank GOD for friends that have celebrated with me, and keep me grounded during these times in my life. As I continue to reflect on what led me to graduate or what pushed me to continue, I try to reminisce on what gave me the strength to move on. There were many times within my 12 years journey, that I wanted to give up. I spent these last 2 years, working super hard to earn good grades, to study hard, and learn as much as possible. The growth in my life within these past years, are indescribable. I am not saying I am all done growing but I know that I can say I have learned so much. I also take a look at my parents and how overjoyed they are, I know that they are super proud of my accomplishments, and I know I can never repay them for their sacrifice, coming to this country to give their family a new opportunity. I can see in their eyes the joy, and I am glad today that I can make them proud. So many of us can take for granted the opportunities that exist for us. I am learning to not take life for granted. I don't know what it is, actually I do, there is this joy in my life, that surpasses any disappointments and pains I may have endured in my past. It is my mission to continue to move forward with the task the God has appointed for me.
This entire year, thus far, I have received confirmation after confirmation, reassuring me that God has me at the place I need to be. Just yesterday, I met with a group of dreamers that are fighting for their dreams. I can relate simply because I know the struggle and determination it takes. In speaking to them my heart was filled with compassion and enthusiasm as I embark this journey with them. I know that this is the perfect timing. I have been prepared to be where I am. All I can remember is a dream/vision I had several years ago, where in that dream I led many young kids. Never in my wildest dream did I imagine what it meant, and I limited it to what I knew then. Silly me, God's plans were far greater than mine. These dreams I am fighting for, these kids I am going to help, are only a small chunk of HIS plan for my life. I have learned to surrender, little by little. To have faith in this walk, to know that at the end I am simply here to complete my mission. I am here to be of example to the world, and be accountable for each other. I am finding it surprisingly difficult to put words to my emotions right now. I won't lie, there is an inch of my human flesh that is tempted to fear the good that is here but I surrender those emotions.
Let this continue to be a lesson to me and you, our plans are no where near God's plans. I am so enamored with the life that I have been given, and despite not always getting what I want, I know for a fact that HE makes sure I will get what I need. It is simple, we must trust and keep moving. Believe me, trusting will be much more difficult some days, but that doesn't mean we won't make it through the day.
Humbled by HIS LOVE,
Friday, April 6, 2012
You're so vain..
Sometimes we are so busy looking too far into the future that we forget the present moment. That is one of the problems I faced when starting my diets or better said healthy lifestyle changes. We have to learn to live in the moment, and it is taking note of the present moment that will enable us to embrace the future. Discouragement has knocked at my door, but one thing I am learning to do is fall in love with the person that GOD has created within me. We fail to take note of the who we are and the beauty within us. There has been a very controversial article all over the media about a women writer that has been accused of being vain for writing about the "repercussions" of being a beautiful woman. This morning on the the TODAY show she spoke about how her intent was not to make others see her as this vain person, it was simply to make a statement. However, never did she imagine recieving so much criticism for her article.
It had me thinking..once again about how focused we are on the perception of beauty through the eyes of others. We fail to see beauty through the most important figure in our lives, which is GOD's. I am able to understand everyday more and more the true value of my life because I have come to a complete understanding of the love the GOD has for me. I don't only feel "special" but honored. Honestly, feeling honored is many times more important than simply feeling "special". There is a sense of respect to honor, and if we love and honor the person that we have been created to be then we will truly respect our bodies as GOD has intended for us to do so.
I no longer question the value of my life, because i know that I am loved. I have also been blessed by seeing this love materialize through the lives the of the amazing people I have been surrounded with. This love has not made me vain about my beauty but humble because I was honored by HIS life.
Thank you Jesus for you unconditional love, and for teaching me to love myself first, so then I can love others!
It had me thinking..once again about how focused we are on the perception of beauty through the eyes of others. We fail to see beauty through the most important figure in our lives, which is GOD's. I am able to understand everyday more and more the true value of my life because I have come to a complete understanding of the love the GOD has for me. I don't only feel "special" but honored. Honestly, feeling honored is many times more important than simply feeling "special". There is a sense of respect to honor, and if we love and honor the person that we have been created to be then we will truly respect our bodies as GOD has intended for us to do so.
I no longer question the value of my life, because i know that I am loved. I have also been blessed by seeing this love materialize through the lives the of the amazing people I have been surrounded with. This love has not made me vain about my beauty but humble because I was honored by HIS life.
Thank you Jesus for you unconditional love, and for teaching me to love myself first, so then I can love others!
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Finding inspiration in my thirties...
Who said turning 30 would be a bummer? Lies, it was all lies. I have experienced nothing but excitement as I embrace this new era of my life. I can freely say that obtaining my degree after what seemed like an eternity was one of my greatest accomplishments at this age. I received my new era in Florida surrounded by warm weather and the beach. I felt so close to nature. It reminded me of what are the things that inspire me. I must confess despite classifying myself as a very logical thinker, I obtain much of my motivation through inspiration, which means there is a very emotional side to me.
I need to focus on what inspires me right now to continue to pursue my goals: travel, weight loss, active participation in helping immigrants, my career, my education... my own family?
Things I need to focus on:
1. My faith - loving GOD above all things!
2. Self-Control
3. Nature
4. Family
5. Friends
6. Loving me
7. Letting go
I need to focus on what inspires me right now to continue to pursue my goals: travel, weight loss, active participation in helping immigrants, my career, my education... my own family?
Things I need to focus on:
1. My faith - loving GOD above all things!
2. Self-Control
3. Nature
4. Family
5. Friends
6. Loving me
7. Letting go
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Finding hope in a hopeless place..
Happy New Years 2012!
I can't believe how fast time has flown, we are now in 2012 ... it seems as if just yesterday I was 19, but we know that is not true. :) Yesterday a friend of mine asked me about my blogging and the fact that I hadn't blogged recently. She was right, I have had so much on my mind but hadn't had the chance to write because of all my school work, aren't I glad that I did today though. My last semester towards my bachelors approaches, in approximately one week I will be done with my semester culminating my bachelors degree, Aleluya! It is a dream come true. It is my reality. For so long I battled about completing this degree, for whatever "non-justifiable" reason I found, in other words making excuses. Truth is, we all encounter times in our lives where we have these dreams, these future goals and plans that seem so far away to us. So far at a distance, that we are to afraid to believe in them because, they are barely visible. It is almost as if these dreams will never happen, and then boom, next thing you know it your dream has become a reality. Now, I ask myself, how exactly did this transition from dream to reality occur for me?
For so long I doubted my ability to achieve this goal. I have to admit at some point I didn't even want it anymore, only because I figured I was better not having it. But in the pit of my being, there was a small, very small chunk, that I was unaware of, that still believed in me and wanted it. I had my fair share of bloopers in my life as we all do, but they are simply lessons learned. I faced some hardships and so many changes in my life that simply made it easy for me to say, "this is too tough, I must quit". I am so glad that I didn't. I thought to myself, I am better off not wanting more for now because I will not manage it. I was wrong and right at the same time. I tell you why, although that time in my life didn't necessarily feel equipped to do it, it was really up to me to make that effort to want it enough to commit to the responsibility.
Looking back, today, I realize these past two years have not been any easier but what was different? Believe me, I had plenty of "good" reasons to say, perhaps this is not my time, or I must simply leave it for later but, I didn't. I was determined to continue. Today as I examine my life, I realize that my efforts were not ineffective they paid off. My emotions weren't always in my favor, staying focused was so difficult and I found myself contemplating complacency in my life, but I stayed determined, I didn't give up.
There is a song from Rihanna that has been flooding the radio, I have to admit I am kind of hooked on it. The title of the song is "We Found Love in a Hopeless Place", what does this have to do with what I was saying earlier, you ask. See, here is the thing. I find that sometimes , this is the truth in our own world we are hopeless because of the troubles we face. According to the thesaurus, hopeless is - "bad, beyond recall, cynical, dejected, demoralized, despairing, desperate, despondent, disconsolate, discouraging, downhearted, fatal, helpless, ill-fated, impossible, impracticable, in despair, incurable, irredeemable, irreparable, past hope, pointless, sad, shot down, sinister, sunk, threatening". Sometimes we can't seem to grapple hope in such a hopeless world not to mention love in a loveless world. There have been times that I have lost hope for myself, for my own life, and for my dreams, but we must not give up on hope. As much as I wanted in the past to give up on my dreams, I am glad I didn't. Here I am almost 12 years later about to finish my degree. It took me twelve years, but I never gave up. I lost hope many times but never gave up. The same applies to any current dreams we may have. I know that it is better to give up and say it will never happen. I will never be happy, I will never achieve my dreams but this isn't true. Don't ever give up. Even I have to remind myself this. We forget how we made it to our goals once we achieve them, but glad I was able to take this moment to reflect and remember what I had to go through in life in order to get here. There were many obstacles but I am grateful because I was always given the strength to continue believing. Believe in love, find hope in a hopeless place.
I can't believe how fast time has flown, we are now in 2012 ... it seems as if just yesterday I was 19, but we know that is not true. :) Yesterday a friend of mine asked me about my blogging and the fact that I hadn't blogged recently. She was right, I have had so much on my mind but hadn't had the chance to write because of all my school work, aren't I glad that I did today though. My last semester towards my bachelors approaches, in approximately one week I will be done with my semester culminating my bachelors degree, Aleluya! It is a dream come true. It is my reality. For so long I battled about completing this degree, for whatever "non-justifiable" reason I found, in other words making excuses. Truth is, we all encounter times in our lives where we have these dreams, these future goals and plans that seem so far away to us. So far at a distance, that we are to afraid to believe in them because, they are barely visible. It is almost as if these dreams will never happen, and then boom, next thing you know it your dream has become a reality. Now, I ask myself, how exactly did this transition from dream to reality occur for me?
For so long I doubted my ability to achieve this goal. I have to admit at some point I didn't even want it anymore, only because I figured I was better not having it. But in the pit of my being, there was a small, very small chunk, that I was unaware of, that still believed in me and wanted it. I had my fair share of bloopers in my life as we all do, but they are simply lessons learned. I faced some hardships and so many changes in my life that simply made it easy for me to say, "this is too tough, I must quit". I am so glad that I didn't. I thought to myself, I am better off not wanting more for now because I will not manage it. I was wrong and right at the same time. I tell you why, although that time in my life didn't necessarily feel equipped to do it, it was really up to me to make that effort to want it enough to commit to the responsibility.
Looking back, today, I realize these past two years have not been any easier but what was different? Believe me, I had plenty of "good" reasons to say, perhaps this is not my time, or I must simply leave it for later but, I didn't. I was determined to continue. Today as I examine my life, I realize that my efforts were not ineffective they paid off. My emotions weren't always in my favor, staying focused was so difficult and I found myself contemplating complacency in my life, but I stayed determined, I didn't give up.
There is a song from Rihanna that has been flooding the radio, I have to admit I am kind of hooked on it. The title of the song is "We Found Love in a Hopeless Place", what does this have to do with what I was saying earlier, you ask. See, here is the thing. I find that sometimes , this is the truth in our own world we are hopeless because of the troubles we face. According to the thesaurus, hopeless is - "bad, beyond recall, cynical, dejected, demoralized, despairing, desperate, despondent, disconsolate, discouraging, downhearted, fatal, helpless, ill-fated, impossible, impracticable, in despair, incurable, irredeemable, irreparable, past hope, pointless, sad, shot down, sinister, sunk, threatening". Sometimes we can't seem to grapple hope in such a hopeless world not to mention love in a loveless world. There have been times that I have lost hope for myself, for my own life, and for my dreams, but we must not give up on hope. As much as I wanted in the past to give up on my dreams, I am glad I didn't. Here I am almost 12 years later about to finish my degree. It took me twelve years, but I never gave up. I lost hope many times but never gave up. The same applies to any current dreams we may have. I know that it is better to give up and say it will never happen. I will never be happy, I will never achieve my dreams but this isn't true. Don't ever give up. Even I have to remind myself this. We forget how we made it to our goals once we achieve them, but glad I was able to take this moment to reflect and remember what I had to go through in life in order to get here. There were many obstacles but I am grateful because I was always given the strength to continue believing. Believe in love, find hope in a hopeless place.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Forget Everything And Restart
When faced with fear we are tempted to give up, we are pushed to surrender but we cannot let go. We must not give up. There are days that I am forced to face with opposition in life, there are days when the circumstances I am faced with seem so unfair and I cry because I simply don't like what I am seeing. Frustration takes over and the patience that I claimed seems to start failing me. My persistency to succeed and move forward is hit, we want to give up. Pain and sadness sneaks up on us and tries to bound our feet from moving forward, it paralyzes our dreams. One must not give up though. Those pains that sneak up on us try to establish a fear in us. What does that FEAR do? It limits us to what greater things are prepared for us.
I sometimes find that I am tempted to surrender to fear, let it control my present. FEAR is a result of a belief that something terrible will happen. FEAR of being in a relationship because you might get hurt. FEAR of being single because you will never find someone. FEAR to go to school because you can't see yourself being smart enough to make it. FEAR of not going to school because you will never reach your dreams. YOU see fear will limit. SOMEONE over the summer taught me such a valuable lesson. NEVER, EVER make a decision out of fear -- why? Because if you make a decision out of fear you are already setting limits to the results of that decision. The decision made out of fear will be short term -- and perhaps have permanent damage. When we make decisions out fear we will compromise ourselves because we are afraid that if we don't make this decision there will be no other options for us. So you choose, whether you want to live your life in fear or love. "Perfect love will cast out fear" and I believe in that.
NOT always am I the best are living this but I have found that this is the best way to live your life. YES, we will have some fears in our lives. SURE, somethings will almost seem to make more sense if we do them out of fear, but partly there is a sense of control on our half and our lack of trust and faith will push us to compromise. Sure, I question why somethings are the way they are in my life now, I won't even lie. I doubt at times that things will work out for me, but that is short term. ON the long run I know deep in my heart that I will get to where I need to get as long as I continue to believe. LIFE is too short to compromise ourselves to walk unhappy. I am compromised to myself to be happy. If I can't even love myself enough or love, love, then chances are I will be miserable but conformity has taken over. Don't misunderstand me, BE HAPPY where you are, but don't mistaken conformity for thankfulness. Life is intended to live progressively, NOT for us to never learn and grow. Lately, YES true, I am scarred sometimes, the past haunts us and the future just simply scares us. I guess that is why truth is the best way to live life is by the moment. We will use our knowledge of our past and our future to help us create consciousness of who we are but it will not control the outcome of what we will do. As tough as it may seem sometimes we simply need to restart and conduce ourselves in a forward manner. Just remember as Winston Churchill would say "NEVER GIVE UP" ... proceed with your goals .. move forward with your life. YOU CAN DO IT. Believe IT!
I sometimes find that I am tempted to surrender to fear, let it control my present. FEAR is a result of a belief that something terrible will happen. FEAR of being in a relationship because you might get hurt. FEAR of being single because you will never find someone. FEAR to go to school because you can't see yourself being smart enough to make it. FEAR of not going to school because you will never reach your dreams. YOU see fear will limit. SOMEONE over the summer taught me such a valuable lesson. NEVER, EVER make a decision out of fear -- why? Because if you make a decision out of fear you are already setting limits to the results of that decision. The decision made out of fear will be short term -- and perhaps have permanent damage. When we make decisions out fear we will compromise ourselves because we are afraid that if we don't make this decision there will be no other options for us. So you choose, whether you want to live your life in fear or love. "Perfect love will cast out fear" and I believe in that.
NOT always am I the best are living this but I have found that this is the best way to live your life. YES, we will have some fears in our lives. SURE, somethings will almost seem to make more sense if we do them out of fear, but partly there is a sense of control on our half and our lack of trust and faith will push us to compromise. Sure, I question why somethings are the way they are in my life now, I won't even lie. I doubt at times that things will work out for me, but that is short term. ON the long run I know deep in my heart that I will get to where I need to get as long as I continue to believe. LIFE is too short to compromise ourselves to walk unhappy. I am compromised to myself to be happy. If I can't even love myself enough or love, love, then chances are I will be miserable but conformity has taken over. Don't misunderstand me, BE HAPPY where you are, but don't mistaken conformity for thankfulness. Life is intended to live progressively, NOT for us to never learn and grow. Lately, YES true, I am scarred sometimes, the past haunts us and the future just simply scares us. I guess that is why truth is the best way to live life is by the moment. We will use our knowledge of our past and our future to help us create consciousness of who we are but it will not control the outcome of what we will do. As tough as it may seem sometimes we simply need to restart and conduce ourselves in a forward manner. Just remember as Winston Churchill would say "NEVER GIVE UP" ... proceed with your goals .. move forward with your life. YOU CAN DO IT. Believe IT!
Monday, October 3, 2011
Consuming Fire.
There is a strong feeling of love that consumes my heart. Sometimes I don't even know what to do with this feeling? I am humbled by this great overwhelming feeling that has wrapped my heart to a point where I don't even know how to keep myself from showing it. However, there are different levels of love that we will have for each other. All I can pray is that I can know that the purity of GOD's love is what keeps my heart pounding for HIS love. But what when you love someone that doesn't love you the same way back? Do you stop loving them or do you continue to shower them with GOD's love and deposit in GOD's hand the rest because there is just so much you can do. I can no longer hold back that love that consumes my heart, so much that my heart wants to jump out and just love everyone with so much passion. It is a fire that surely consumes but only because of that love. God's love is that one that consumes you with love. That consuming fire that we know of is that eternal love that GOD has for us. There is no fear, no evil, no wrong doing in LOVE. I cannot completely ever comprehend the intensity of GOD's love all I know is that it has taken my heart to another love. There are so many things one can do for LOVE one of them is to completely devote oneself to that LOVE one feels.
MY love comes from above and because it is derived from God's love I am able to experience love to a whole other level in my life. All I can do is embrace this LOVE because fighting it will lead me nowhere, I am surrendered to this powerful gift of LOVE. MY heart delights in YOU LORD because you are my strength and because the LOVE that POWERFUL love will be the one that will help me overcome evil with LOVE. I believe in the power of LOVE I believe that there is a fulfilling power in the LOVE GOD has given us.
MY love comes from above and because it is derived from God's love I am able to experience love to a whole other level in my life. All I can do is embrace this LOVE because fighting it will lead me nowhere, I am surrendered to this powerful gift of LOVE. MY heart delights in YOU LORD because you are my strength and because the LOVE that POWERFUL love will be the one that will help me overcome evil with LOVE. I believe in the power of LOVE I believe that there is a fulfilling power in the LOVE GOD has given us.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Love and Respect
Relationships are about Love and Respect
While loving you is crucial for us to be together
Respecting you will insure us making it till the end
We build our life based on fairy tales dismissing the fact that reality
has to do with more important factors
Encourage me to love and respect you so that at the end these two
can continuously reinforce why being together simply makes sense
Not only will it help us make it work but it will prepare us to face the not
so workable days
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