How to incentivize staff with no money?

I was a front desk receptionist for a social service office in Westchester working on my undergrad as a public administrator when I asked myself this question for the first time. How do you incentivize staff with no money? I remember hearing for the first time that managers weren't allowed to give staff gifts valued higher than $25 and well salaries weren't that high. That night I went home and as usual went to bed thinking how can a manager then really appreciate the work of their employees when they are limited. Remember, I was only 21 at the time so this was all new to me. I was still learning so much about management. This was probably my first journey into management. I just never imagined 12 years later I would be answering my own question. Fast forward to my today. I am leading a team of professionals that are doing some amazing work along my side. As you may already know, non-profit work and that which works with trauma and direct services can be stressful. So how do I incentivize and motivate my staff to stay motivated, flexible and committed to their task and team? Here are my three favorite tips: Relationship: Many managers are very afraid of becoming personally involved with their staff. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying to build a out of work - buddy buddy relationship with your staff. What I am referring to is, let's be relational. Interact with your staff and lead with honesty. Let your staff know that you understand them, support them and will be there to guide them. Build that trust that will have them following you and respecting your decisions. Learn their names, give them a space to feel comfortable to be honest with you and know when to be professional and off the record. Appreciate: One of the practices I have is always thank my staff for what they do. I remind them, what they do is for the population we serve, the team they are part of and their professional skills that they will continue to sharpen. One of my childhood lessons that my mother made sure I practiced everywhere I went was manners. I remember the kitchen staff at my school telling my mother, "your daughter never fails to thank me" you'd be surprised what that can do to people working hard after a long day. So thank you after a long day of your teams day. Let them know you appreciate their dedication. Listen to them: It is hard for your employees to communicate to them their needs. Many times staff is afraid of approaching you to discuss how they are feeling in the job, how they are managing their task or how they are feeling that day. If you practice the steps above you will get them to listen to you. Everybody wants to be heard. You want your team to be able to give you feedback. How else will I grow as a leader? There is no better way to give someone value for their work and skills then to listen to their feedback. Not only will their ideas potentially improve a process but it will ultimately build confidence in your team to be independent thinkers and push themselves to improvement. At the end - a nice lunch on the boss won't hurt!

Millennial Confessions!

I think that most of us can agree that trying new things, taking risk, is always scary. I know, I know -- we all hear the many inspirational stories of the men and women that accomplished by taking chances, by never giving up. This got me thinking, when I am planning my next move, when I am ready to move forward, what holds be back the most? Granted, I have to say, I have, over time, learned how to better train myself to push past the opposition. What holds me back, temporarily and pushed me to hide behind the shadows of others, is, what if I fail? Something my pastor said last night has been resonating all day. When you fail so many times, it's really not so bad. HA! He is a comedian. So true though, you learn to get back up. Not sure if you can relate with my story, my greatest struggle has been that initial risk. That first jump. There is so much said about young cats my age (yes I said young.) I have read articles, emails, statuses, tweets... you name it. Millennials are this, millennials are that. So I ask my fellow millennials, what are some of your own thoughts? I can tell you about this (me) millennial. I seek purpose and intention in what I do, as a professional. Do I know it all? Do I encounter moments where the two don't always match, indeed. Today I sit and ask myself, what is it that I want to do in life? I want to help people? But how? I have to first identify my skills, and flaws. It's okay, weaknesses are okay and just an FYI friends, it's okay to not be perfect at everything. Going back, so yes, weaknesses and strengths. Identify them in your life. Don't beat yourself up, believe me there is always someone that appears to be smarter than me, they are like my heroes. Did you identify these? Now, let's go back for a second, look at these flaws, what can you do to improve them? Listen, I admit, I am not the best at writing and my grammar, let's just say, not always the best. Does that stop me? Yes, sometimes. Forever? No! I take it with a grain of salt. If you are like, you are probably your worst critic, or best. You got that, now let's continue to identify these and just work on them. It may take some time, I feel your pain or anxiety. Ha! But don't give up. Let me share something, if I have grown in my professional, spiritual, emotional and physical health it has to be because of the people I surround myself with. I am not afraid to be told, you did it wrong, doesn't mean you want someone who will always put you down, but someone who can be honest with you. So, even if it hurts, have mentors by your side that will coach you. Shoutout to my mentor(s) - they are the best! Take it one day at a time. Make mistakes, it's okay. Learn from these mistakes though. Work on your confidence and as I learned last night, this confidence should not be rooted in your success, I mean it's nice and all, but it shouldn't. It should be rooted in love. Knowing that at the end of the day, who you are, is not just about what you do, but what you have within you. Your character and ability to withstand opposition in life. Have a little faith. All will be well. Sincerely a millennial,

Tough to admit.

I admit, it's tough for me to, well admit, when I am not feeling my best. I appreciate my journals, and blogs for that matter. When I can't seem to pin-point what is it that is roaming my mind, I must write. I write, and write. Sometimes, that writing does not use ink, it stays in my thoughts. Today, I decided, let's type. I feel my emotions getting the best of me, and while I struggle to compose myself, sometimes it doesn't feel that easy. It is so much easier sometimes, to move forward, and then you have the bad days. Those days where nothing makes sense, and you have to be okay with this. Days when life takes a toll, and although you know that everything will be okay, your mind plays tricks with you, not reassuring you of this. I have no choice but let it out, I allow for that emotion to come to life, and then I have to crush it. Not so gently because, now, this emotion is causing a bit of anxiety. The ground shakes, your nails get shorter, your nights get longer, and mornings get heavier. What is it about life that can have you in a turmoil, and almost feeling as if, you want to run, just run. Run, perhaps near a beach, where the air is fresh, where the grass is green, where the water flows freely. Absorbs that energy, but you know what, you know it's part of life. One must withstand, and move forward. Be committed to life, even when, living doesn't seem that gentle. Commit to loving thyself, sooooo-much, that no matter what, we will always care and love.

Because gratitude is the expression of Love....

I started writing a status on my facebook and soon realized, this may be a little too long, let me write a blog better. Today in the place we like to temporary call home, earth, there is a celebration of "love" ... or better knows as Valentines Day! So many single folk dread this day, and honestly I can see why. Don't feel bad for single people, while I will embrace love, in all it's forms, I don't lament being single. It really hasn't been that bad (for me) -- it has truly given me a chance to learn so much about me, the people around me, my faith, and last but not least, God's love for me! Yep, my faith is a big part of my life, and it has taught me some valuable lessons. I do have to admit, in the past, I lacked "love" in my life, I had bitterness, and was not living a life in abundance, as I was called to. I hated everyone and everything, (but hid it very well.) I smiled, and (at times) even hugged folks, but deep inside I was full of pain, and hatred. I can't say that my hatred was justifiable, but I had seen some things in life that had washed away the meaning of love, (no I wasn't broken hearted by men) it was just, life happened. So to say that I lived in bitterness, may be actually conservative. Today a few years, after undergoing some spiritual surgery and cleansing, I can say that love reigns in my heart. I have experienced the wonderful, unconditional love from my parents, the not so perfect, I don't agree with them all the time love, but YES unconditional love. I have learned so much to appreciate them for what they have taught me, for loving me till the end, for never giving up on our relationship, Thank you mom and dad for this! I want to thank my brothers who challenge me everyday, keep me on my toes, and in their individual ways always seem to capture my heart, they will always be my favorite men (don't tell this to my future-boo). To my friends/family best-friends, partners in crime, soul-chika-mates, long-life friends, you have never left my side, even when we disagreed and argued, our relationships have always challenged us to love past all those things, love beyond unimaginable measures, love past ways I never even thought I was capable of loving, love is seriously like a rubber-band, it keep stretching. Thank you April, thank you Yoely for being my best-friends for life. I always had a hard time "labeling" relationships, because of my own insecurities, but I can gracefully say you ladies have loved me unconditionally and I am so deeply grateful for this. My DCS, junior high school friends, that boy oh boy did we share so many good moments, Diana, Kary, Aimee -- Diana and Kary thank you for opening your hearts to me, I remember our "friendship letters" we would write to each other, and the many fun, unforgettable moments we shared in school. My cousins that have stood by my side, even when we don't get to talk as much. You were my first best friends teaching me what a "bra" looked like, teaching me what "liking" boys was all about, what would I have done without you? I have to give a shout-out to Sara, you once taught me a valuable lesson about being a "lady" - as you knew being raised with boys, I was kinda of a tom-boy, but one day you told me "Gaby you need to let boys be nice to you", it took me some time Sara, but I think I got what you meant that day. To all my other friends, that have become such a unique treasure in my life that I would never trade for nothing in the world, you ladies, Diana, Jeanine, Crystal, Kimmie, Christina, Ruthy, Nai,Mickie, Denise, Karyn, Matos, - gosh so many ... I have been so blessed with an extended family and you have truly become that in my life. There are so many people I would want to name, and the order of the names really has no meaning. Each and every one of you has impacted me, and walked with me, made sure I don't space out, or continue to teach me so much in life. I know that I can count on you at all times. There have been leaders in my life that have shown me so many characteristics to make me a better person, guided me through my career-choices, through my heart-aches with life, my faith-walk -- I wouldn't be half the leader I am today had it not been for people that invested in me, so for all of this I want to thank you, my childhood pastor, Rev. Jose River (RIP), Robert Reyes, Ralphy, Aida... my teachers that loved me and pushed me - and now the leaders God has blessed me and surround me with love, grace and leadership, Gabriel and Jeanette, along with some loving leaders at The Lambs Church (a place I like to call home, "where life is met with love") that invest in me everyday and teach me something new, thank you!!! I have to recognize my niece and nephews that have brought so much joy and love in my life. If one ever has hesitation of their capabilities of loving, they are destroyed the moments these little people are born. I have experienced a whole new level of love in my life. They make my world spin, and my heart overflow!! I love you little ones, your life is a gift to me. Last but not least, I have to mention the love-of-my-soul, my Jireh, my Nissi, "the Father, Son and Holy Spirit" for loving me and walking through life with me. Enjoy this Valentines Day, my friends, whether you are single, married, unmarried on this day of celebration or any day for that matter, love will always conquer and WIN!!! I love you all!!!

Barefoot.

"What is wrong with my bare feet? I like walking barefooted." A Guatemalan, indigenous woman asked "Why do we need to wear shoes, why is it that when people visit us they want to put shoes on our feet? Is there something wrong with me not having shoes, I like to walk barefooted." As this woman walked in her bare feet, she seemed at peace, she seemed happy, shoes didn't make her happy. She couldn't understand why other people aren't happy that she doesn't wear their shoes. It's so easy for me walk in my own shoes, and see life only my own way. Do I ever bother to put on the shoes of others? As I was ready to call it a night, and after I published this blog, in bed I wondered about what I had written,in tears I decided, I must add to this. All I can think about is the images of the many people I met, the stories I heard. So many times, we think we know what others have gone through and we really don't know. We don't even bother to ask or care because our society has taught us not to care, or simply have no time to care. During this trip, I was intentional of not assuming to know what the people of Guatemala go through. I purposely tossed any idea I had of Guatemalans, and made it a point to listen to them and try to walk in their shoes. I don't think I can survive a day in their shoes, but I attempted to. Even the few days I spent with them, I barely slipped on the shoe, and I can feel the pain burdening my heart. I am asleep in bed, not a perfect life, but not worrying about my lands being seized by large cane sugar companies or mining companies wanting to build mines where I plant my next meal. I can only reflect on the many miles they had to walk, literally and metaphorically. Can I even walk barefooted, endure the pain of this path? While listening to klove, Scott, spoke about Syria, and the tragedies this country is facing. We pray for this country, pray for peace, and protection. I won't attempt to discuss or debate on what has been going on because honestly I don't know enough. However, one thing Scott did point out was the story of Jesus, how Jesus became man to walk in our feet, Jesus didn't bring us his own shoes, and imposed them on us, he simply, came to this world as man but GOD and set the example. If only we committed our lives to walk in the shoes of others, understand their pains, and journey with them, I wonder how different this world would be. May her story inspire me to understand to respect the path that others have walked, never undermine their story, because we all have our own stories, and love on people. Respect People. Fight for Justice.

Simple things (post Guatemala trip)

I recently returned from my mission trip to Guatemala. I have to elaborate so much more on the details of my trip, however, I arrived a week ago and I am still internalizing my entire experience. In the meantime I keep writing the traditional "journaling" way. I did want to talk about "simple things" in life. One of my greatest internal conflicts has been this fight about what I have seen over the last 31 years of my life versus what I experienced in 3 weeks. What I thought to be valuable is not even in the radar of so many people I met. We are consumed by the latest fashion, the biggest house, the highest payed salary, etc, you get the point? Nothing wrong with being ambitious and wanting more in life, or is there? I walked through these very simple towns in Guatemala, in the Quiche region, one of the areas most affected by the internal conflicts of guerilla and military. In an area where so many people were massacred, I couldn't help but to think about their lives, their stories. I saw these stores called "pacas" that sold, all this "american" fashion, oh how they long to be like us. All I can really do is yell within me, and say no! Don't get me wrong, not because I don't love my country (US) but because we have it all twisted. We get in debt to stay in fashion, to have the latest car, even the best education. To them, we are the greatest. I couldn't help but to stare out at the lands they had. The beautiful flowers, the green mountains, the running rivers, the small street vendors, the older person smiling saying "buenos dias" to me. The beauty in these things, oh the beauty. The simple walk in town, where the little old lady on the corner is trying to sell me fresh fruit, chopped and ready to eat. The simple walk in town, where all of a sudden we are stuck in traffic because there is music coming from the streets, school bands playing in a parade, all these kids, singing and dancing. All I can do is cry, yes, cry because it's these simple things that fill my heart. In a town where so much pain was endured, they still found joy in the little things. That night the group of ladies that were traveling with me were ready for bed, I felt the bed I would sleep in and with so much excitement yelled, oh yes a nice and comfy bed, with a "fluffy" pillow, tonight I will sleep like a baby. I was wrong, I didn't sleep. At 2:00AM I heard firecrackers and folks serenading with "marimbas" a traditional Guatemalan music. I laughed, I said, there goes my sleep. They partied all right, partied so much I didn't sleep that night, lol. All these small stories makes me rethink about what I appreciate in life, I won't lie I certainly appreciated silence at night hahaha. No but really, I was inspired to value more in life, not because of what these families didn't have,because in many cases most of them have never probably seen all the things we fill our apartments with, that in reality put very little use to. They valued other things in life, they value the water from the rivers, the lands that brings them food, the air that fills their lungs. These simple but important things, that we take for granted. These mayan speaking families, protect these lands with their lives, and have lost their lives because it's all they know.

I ask myself, what are the things in life that really matter and I dare ask you, what are some things in your life, that really matter?

Resiliency: pursuing your own dreams.

Things are stirring within me. I think some of you will relate to how I am feeling. If you are an independent person, born sometime within this century, I know you will understand where I am coming from. I have to be very honest with you, I don't do well sharing all my emotions hmm, pretty much all the time. I can articulate other topics but my emotions, boy oh boy is that tough. I can see my friends read this and nod firmly in approval. I have chosen to write about this today, because although, this is not a common blog post for even me, I have felt the need to embrace every stage in my life as I am learning an intentional dependency on God. Now to my non-church folk, I am so sorry this will probably make even less sense to you.

Dependency, what is that? I know, so hard for us these days to know the balance. A child of immigrant parents, becoming independent is probably a prerequisite for us. My parents traveled from Guatemala, and all I can remember is them working hard, hard work all the time, everyday, no excuses. Never did my parents give up. Resiliency should have a picture of my parents in the dictionary because honestly that's all I can think of when I see that. So I sit here thinking, what was my parents dreams? What drove them to be so resilient and endure hardships in their life? How come they were able to cross the border, that's right they did that. Overcome language barriers and some stereotypes of who they were and what they came to do to this country. Learned, a new culture, a new language, left their families in Guatemala and all of this for what? My parents were resilient. I think about my life, my own struggles and what I have done to reach my goals. I have to say, I fall so short to their resilience. I think about my own dreams, and the many times I feel like giving up, and say, where is my resilience? Not saying I haven't endured my own challenges in life, however, all I can sit right now, and say to myself is Gaby where is your dream, and are you resilient? It's easy to push others to their dreams, but what stops us from pushing our own?

Recently my dreams have been pretty out of the ordinary. I will be the first to admit to this. I guess, it really doesn't make any sense, at least to the measure of my standards of "common sense" - I can't help but to meditate on the words that were shared with us by my pastor on Sunday. What forms my thinking? Why am I so challenged to not embrace this dream, I am dreaming. My heart is beating fast and it's a love that doesn't make sense in my mind, but my heart and soul are at peace, as I think about this dream. It is these things that go agains our human nature, and I challenge myself because I ask, how can I be possibly think that this will work? By this I mean "dream" - I know right now this all may sound like crazy talk, you see what I mean? I am learning though, I don't have it mastered yet, but I am sure learning. Even if it seems crazy, push your dreams, don't let anything get in the way, especially not yourself, and your powerful logic. I know that all my logical thinkers can appreciate this. What your mind cannot see, let your heart embrace.