Several things have occurred to me during these past few days. I will try to organize my thoughts without getting myself or you lost. Foremost, I have to make a confession, I had a piece of cake, bad Gaby. I know, I feel so bad, nevertheless I continue to do my fast. This has been the best thing I have done thus far, can I just say. Without noticing, I have been awakened from a deep sleep. I call it sleep because I was almost falling into this dead routine, coma. How boring can that get? I am definitely an advocate for personal security. However, many times in our lives we use "security" as an excuse to not take risks and do certain things that may require a little more faith than other situations. It's in those moments, when we are challenged with the how's and why's, and we have no idea how will we even accomplish our goals or ambitions that we need to go ahead and not be such a coward.
Am I saying that certain routines are not good, indeed they are. Some routines are intended to keep us on track with life. However, as a christian I ask myself, what am I doing to make a difference? Has my life become a religious routine? Yes, okay... it's great to be a good citizen, a good child, a responsible adult, an awesome human being. But, what impact am I leaving on the lives of others, more importantly how am I impacting my own life. I was sitting by the pier near my job and kept asking myself how will I want to be remembered? As this nice, responsible person and that is it? What is GOD challenging me to do that I have not yet made a step forward to pursue. Perhaps I like to live my life on the edge, so call me a daredevil please!!
A friend asked me yesterday.. when we were discussing about me being comfortable, "but are you really comfortable?' Wow! I was like, what.. huh? .. NO, I am not comfortable because in my heart this is not all I want to do. I know that God has promised to be with me till the end, and I have to trust that. How can I live my life to the fullest if I am too busy trying to build constraints around myself. Am I my own barricade? I can't continue to lie to myself and say " oh but I am ok" .. is this how my life is intended to be? Just ok? Just surviving? Hmm.. I don't know, I just can't find myself embracing that idea. So, yes we will face hardships, failures, and some very crappy days, but it's all necessary. It has been during those crappy, unwanted days that I have learned so much. My biggest blessing during those moments have been being able to get up from the floor, remove the dust from my shoes and keep pressing forward. You see, we were never promised a perfect life, all we were promised was peace.
Ahhhhhh (the noise when we drink a nice glass of water after running) there is nothing more refreshing to my soul, than being able to breathe, see,and feel that peace. That peace of GOD that surpasses all understanding. You are darn right it surpasses all understanding because when life seems to not make sense at all, knowing that we can just trust in GOD makes no sense to me, but it works! There is just so much going on in my mind, and heart. From how to change the world one grain at a time, to how to improve my life, one book at a time. What does my heart truly desire? (another question asked by my friend) He really made me reflect! So I will be writing another blog in details about that topic. But yes in order to define, and find clarity on the mission that GOD has set forth in my life I have to find what are my hearts desires, and align them with the will of God in my life.
Because I know that is important to pursue the things that I am passionate about and not just talk about them but be involved, I decided to participate in the immigration reform rally that was held in DC this past Sunday. I was so moved by the amount of people that were there. They were all representing a part of the this country that is struggling with unjust laws that are breaking apart families in our country.
